A Collision Tour

Tuesday night I went down with a crew of people to see David Crowder Band on their "A Collision Tour" in Tulsa. I'm not gonna lie to you... it was awesome.

I know that after I saw Coldplay I said that I probably never see a better show than that in my entire life, but I may just have. I'm not sure, its too early to tell. I'll have to let the experience sit and simmer for a little while.

Either way, though, Crowder was incredible. The 2 opening bands, I wasn't such a fan of, though. Robbie Seay Band opened, and while they were definately talented, I felt like they were quite generic. They were great musicians, its just that their songwriting didn't seem particularly interesting. Maybe I'm the only one...

Shane & Shane went up next. A bunch of the people I was with were already big Shane & Shane fans. I had never heard them (although I had heard a couple of their songs--I was told we sing them in FSM/The Grove quite often). Whichever shane played guitar was a very, very good guitar player. Musically, even though they apparently screwed up a few times, they were incredible. Whoever their drummer was was freaking unbelievable. But, much like I was with Robbie Seay Band, I wasn't particularly interested in their music, for the most part. I would be willing to give one of their albums a shot, though.

When Crowder came up, it was insane. They opened with "Do Not Move," a song I was seriously hoping they would play. Very intense song. When they got to "Foreverandever Etc." Crowder came out with a keytaur and discussed the "phatness" of the beat he layed down with it. Man, the guy can engage a crowd. I would love to see how he engages a community of believers while leading worship.

"You Are My Joy" was the peak of the show, I think.



They ended with "Rescue is Coming" (which, also, was awesome), left the stage, and then came out and encored with Robbie Seay and Shane & Shane on stage with them singing "Be Lifted or Hope Rising." Very, very cool.

I just realized that I have never given my impressions of the new Crowder CD "A Collision" on here. I guess now would be a good time.

I love it. I think David Crowder*Band is one of the only truly creatively progressive bands in worship music today. They're essentially the only "Christian band" that I can with confidence say is one of my favorite bands. They're probably the only "Christian band" I've ever heard that is not content with being reactive to the secular pop music scene. It seems to me that most Christian artists tend to come off as being "the Christian [insert popular band here]"--gaining their popularity by emulating a sound that a secular band got popular with. Crowder is forging his own sound, and doing a wonderful job of it. I even put Crowder up with the ranks of Radiohead, Wilco, Coldplay, Sufjan Stevens, and Guster from both a pure personal enjoyment standpoint and a creativity standpoint.

Now, with the CD "A Collision or 3+4=7", Crowder has outdone himself. He has created a very, very complete concept album. All of the ideas come off as fully realized. What is the concept? What it means for a Holy being to lower itself (in a manner of speaking) while raising us up to him for us to be able to interact (or Collide, if you will), and how death, life, forgiveness, hope, and abandonment tie into that idea. It is so densely layered with ideas and actual musical layers that it seems like every time I listen to it I discover something new--a new way to interpret a lyric, a new lyric itself, a beautiful banjo part that I had previously never heard, etc. This isn't just a collection of songs, it is a fully realized concept album from start to finish--every part seems to have a meaning. It seems like this is the album that their last CD, "Illuminate" wanted to be (another concept album with the theme of luminious vs. illuminous objects and what it means for us to reflect Christ's light). And while Illuminate was an amazing album (most likely the best contemporary Christian release in 5 years, and one of the best albums period of the year it was released), its smaller scope and narrower focus pales in comparison to "A Collision." Ok, I'm rambling. Lets just get down to the basics: I love "A Collision" and I think it is one of the best albums of the last couple of years, one of my personal favorite albums ever, and probably the most important Christian release since Dc Talk's "Jesus Freak" in the 90s.

I have a pretty funny story to tell about when I met David Crowder Band's lead guitar player, Jason Solley, Tuesday night, but my hands are getting tired. I'll post about it in a few days.

Thats all I have for now.

All there is.

I got my hair cut the other day. It was pretty long. Now its pretty short. It probably hasn't been this short since my sophomore year of high school. I kind of like it, its not as bad as I thought it was gonna be. Thats exciting.

I don't really have much to say today, I guess I'm just kind of killing time. Oh wait, there is this:

I went up to Springdale High School today to see coach Ike and coach Smith. I stayed for probably 45 minutes of the basketball team's practice. It was exactly the same as it was last year. I kind of felt sorry for the guys. The same routine day in and day out used to kill me. I'm not a huge fan of monotony.

When I left, I was driving to Party City to go try on Batman and Spiderman costumes (but thats another story, ask me sometime) when I just thought about what life would be like if I had no knowledge of Christ. What if there was no hope for anything after this life? The everyday monotony, the endless cycles. Going to pre-school to be ready for kindergarten, going to kindergarten to prepare for elementary school, going to elementary school to prepare for middle school, going to middle school to prepare for Jr. High, going to Jr. High to prepare for High School, going to High School to prepare for a job or for college, going to college to prepare for a job or grad school, going to grad school to prepare for a more demanding job, getting a job to prepare to support and a family, raising children and preparing them to go through the same old cycle. Making money so you can buy more things so you can get bored with them a year later and buy newer things so you can get bored with those a year after that. Cycles.

This life just isn't all that great--lets just be honest with ourselves. Sure, it has its moments: hearing an amazing song for the first (or 20th) time, watching a sunset over an ocean, marrying your spouse, watching the birth of your child, eating a really good piece of chocolate cake. Its all good stuff. Some of it is GREAT stuff. But none of it will stand.

If life was simply us experiencing some bad things, some good things, and some great things and then simply ceasing to exist at all, was there any point to any of it?

If we just "ceased to be" when we died, who cares? You woudln't remember any of it, and then your family would die and they wouldn't remember any of it, and then eventually humans would die out and no one would remember any of it--it would be just as if we had never existed.

As believers in Christ, who knows what we will remember from this life when we enter into the presence of God? All I know is that we have the hope of entering into it, which will surpass anything else.

I'm glad this isn't all there is.

Another failure.

Its amazing how you can forget things--important things.

I went to lunch with Brandon George a few days ago, and he started talking about an old friend of ours from elementary school. It has probably been over a year and a half since I've even thought about him. But, for the first time, hearing his name brought a serious sense of guilt and conviction.

A little bit (or a lot) of backstory: Me and this guy, his name is Benly, were probably best friends in elementary school. We spent the night with each other every couple of weeks. He would come over after school every few days to draw (and what great artists we were!). At one point, me and Benly decided to create our own series of comic strips called something like "Toyland". It was about talking toys, shoes, appliances, etc. And, yes, I think it was before "Toy Story" came out. Disney owes us. Big.

Anyways, I moved away to Dallas, TX three-fourths of the way through 4th grade. I didn't really keep in touch with Benly at all (or any of my Arkansas friends, for that matter--except George). But, one year later when I moved back, I immediately started hanging out with all of the old guys again. I didn't hang out with Benly as much as before, but we were still friends.

So, 8th grade rolls around, and I have science with him.

I would like to pause here and talk a little bit about 8th-grade Cameron. 8th-grade Cameron was not a very mature kid. He was immature in most things, in his faith moreso than other things. Looking back, my memory of myself in 8th and 9th grade is one of the most humiliating things to think about for me.

Back to the story: Towards the end of the year in science, Benly and I get into different relatively deep conversations of the spiritual nature. Benly wasn't a believer in Christ, but he enjoyed talking about certain aspects of the faith with me. One day, he came to class and asked me this: "Cameron, what would you do if one of your best friends... (he had trouble getting it out)... if one of your best friends was gay? Would you still be their friend?"

My response to this still kills me. There is not a lot I wouldn't give to go back and change it... I didn't really think about the question, I just spurted out something like "Hahaha, man, I don't know. That would be SOO weird! I don't think I could be friends with someone like that. I mean, I believe that it is sin, and I don't want to be around it." He had a hard time understanding what I meant.

He probably asked me that question 5 or 6 times throughout the rest of the year, each time with more seriousness. Each time, my answer got a little more serious, but a lot less loving. The conversations started to end in full-fledged argument and bitterness. Mostly because I thought that what I was saying was a given, and I didn't know why he was so interested in that question.

I didn't really keep in touch with him over the summer, and I didn't have any classes with him in 9th grade.

When high-school rolled around, it all made sense. I was told in 10th grade that Benly "came out of the closet." He was a self-proclaimed homosexual.

I can't describe the sense of confusion and self-righteousness that filled me as I tried to figure out what all of this meant. I eventually settled on this: "I am a better person than him." Now, in my mind, Benly was a sinner, he was corrupt, he was on Satan's side. And because of this, I may or may not have started to hate him. I can't say for sure. I probably didn't, deep down, but I don't know.

Either way, I made absolutely no effort to talk to him. In fact, I made effort to not talk to him. I would purposely avoid eye-contact with him when walking down the hall. Even looking at him, "a fag", made me uncomfortable. This continued through sophomore year.

Midway through junior year, I began to realize that the way I thought about him and the way I treated him were wrong. I wanted to make things right, to a certain extent. I didn't necessarily want to be friends with him, but I did want to apologize for essentially ignoring him for 2 years.

I never got the nerve to do it, though. By the time senior year rolled around, he was no long attending Springdale High School. I knew where his old house was and had no reason to assume he had moved, but I thought going to his house would be too risky. No one I knew had his number. I was probably kind of relieved.

Since then, my entire perspective on homosexuality has changed. Homosexuals are simply people who struggle with sexual temptation/sin, except that for them, there is no holy, healthy context for it (as there is marriage for man and wife). At the same time, lets not do the "fashionable" thing and sugar-coat it--it is most definately sin. Romans 1:24-27 depicts it as an especially perverse sin (although, again, all sins are equal in that they all separate us from God). The thing is, though... we're still called to love sinners. LOVE them. Not just "tolerate" them. God did love me, after all. Anyways, I think I've gone off on a huge spiel about this before on this blog, so I'll stop there. The main point is, I was terribly out of line in treating Benly that way.

So now we're back to a few days ago. Me and George's lunch conversation. He tells me that he heard Benly had dropped out of school (not just transfered or whatever I had assumed), had gotten into drugs possibly, and was kicked out of his house. Man.

That is when the guilt really, really set in. I had kind of forgotten about him, to be honest. But, now, all of my mistakes are very clear. I failed both God and Benly with ignorance, arrogance, and hate.

I would love to have the chance to talk to him and just apologize to him and tell him if he ever needs anything to let me know. I pray that I will get that chance. I also pray that he is ok. If anyone who reads this could pray these things, and, most importantly, that he would come to know Christ--that would be huge.


People like me give Christians a bad name.